Stupid Proposed Laws Laws
It should be illegal to bring peanuts to school
Because some kids are allergic to peanuts, it should be illegal for anyone to bring them to school. Punishment should be in the form of waterboarding!
Cigarette Butt Cleanliness Law
Drivers who throw out cigarette butts at stoplights will be required to clean up cigarette butts at stoplights while wearing a dunce cap for 10 hours and have to eat 10 cigarette butts.
Its illegal if your a midget and you dress up as a lephercaun
In Fresno, Califronia – If you are found committing this crime you will be tackled by the k-9 unit.
No Skirt Wearing in Bethany, Missouri
While in Bethany Missouri, it is illegal for any black men to wear skirts while driving a truck.
You cannot stumble while walking main street.
In Antonito, Colorado you cannot stumble or swagger while walking down main street. Teens, Drunks and Bums beware Antonito should have a no stumbling law so that everyone walks straight as they walk down main street!
No eating bugs on Sunday or January 9th
No eating bugs of any kind on Sundays or January 9th. Residents of California shall not eat any types of insects, bugs or creepy crawlers, escpecially no eating grasshoppers or crickets. Punishment for eating bugs on Sunday or the no bug eating day of January 9th shall result in a 2nd degree misdemeanor charge!
No baths between March and October
Your not allowed to take BATHS from March trough October, doing so is a serious offense and will be met with a swift punishment.
Glenn Beck Prohibition
Glenn Beck is hereto forthwith declared illegal. “Glenn Beck” will be described from for all purposes of this document as:
1. Having between 10% and 50% of the voting adult population as audience.*
2. Crying on nation television
3. Delivering ultimatums to the Whitehouse
4. Accusing US senators of being terrorists
5. Asking questions that no-one else asks, because they are not crazy, uninformed, and arrogant.
Those found to be Glenn Beck will not be given a trial, but given a choice of either:
1. Pursuing a Harvard education in sociology, education, political science, as well as minoring in philosophy and math.
2. Death
*Provisions for 50% or more viewers may be seen in the document “Operation Grassy Knoll”
People Who Are Caught Cheating
People Who Are Caught Cheating Are Subjected To Public Humiliation.
Fat people have to wear a sticker saying Caution wide turns
if you weigh more than 250 pounds and under 6 ft tall you have to were a sticker saying “CAUTION WIDE TURNS” on your butt
Uniform Christmas Code
That the last Monday of December every year be declared Christmas Sunday to allow for uniform observance of a now secular holiday in every state of the union, excepting Texas and Mississippi in which states Christmas will be observed om the last Friday of every December to allow for longer weekends and to comply with local casual Friday practices in companies employing more than 25 people.
You may not leave grass clippings on your sidewalk or the road.
In Lacon, IL you cannot put grass clippings on your sidewalk or the road. If this law is broken you will be fined $150.