Stupid Laws & Dumb Laws

Vibrator’s are illegal in Texas

webmaster — Sun, 10 Jun 2007 02:28:28 +0000

Under a 1973 Texas law, it is prohibited the sale of ““Obscene device[s]” mean[ing] a device including a dildo or artificial vagina, designed or marketed as useful primarily for the stimulation of human genital organs.“. People have been arrested recently, most notably a store clerk in Lubbock, TX in 2007 & Burleson in 2004.

Can’t collect your own reward money.

webmaster — Tue, 05 Jun 2007 00:27:16 +0000

According to this, you cannot collect your own reward money in North Carolina, she robbed a bank and tried to collect her own reward.

Woman tries to collect own reward money.

Proposed Law: Prosecute parents who miss parent-teacher conferences

webmaster — Wed, 28 Mar 2007 01:25:13 +0000

A Texas law maker recently propsed a law that would make it illegal for a parent to miss a parent-teacher conference. This is “Criminalizing bad behavior has become the rage among politicians, who view such action as a type of legislative exclamation point demonstrating the seriousness of their cause. As a result, new crimes are proliferating at an alarming rate, and we risk becoming a nation of criminals where carelessness or even rudeness is enough to secure a criminal record. ”

Original Article courtesy of Yahoo

Mole trapping regulations in Redmond

webmaster — Wed, 28 Mar 2007 01:22:02 +0000

Mole trappers have recently come under fire in Redmond due to the use of scissor traps to kill the pesky moles, two trappers were shut down by local authorities. The kicker? The local Humane Society says the initiative wasn’t meant to shut down mole trappers! GO figure.

Shaved Ice Stand regulatated in Provo, Utah

webmaster — Wed, 28 Mar 2007 01:15:07 +0000

Provo Utah recently changed the laws to allow shaved ice stands to operate from May 1st to October 31st. Previously, the law only allowed them to operate from June 1st to September 30th. It took the city 10 months to get the shaved-ice law changed! Your tax dollars hard at work!

Bears like menstruating women, wear tampons not pads!

webmaster — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 03:45:18 +0000

The government strongly suggests that women wear internal tampons and not pads…..when hiking in places like Yellowstone National Park. This is directly from the NPS (National Park Service) Website

“Considering bears’ highly developed sense of smell, it may seem logical that they could be attracted to odors associated with menstruation. Studies on this subject are few and inconclusive. If a woman chooses to hike or camp in bear country during menstruation, a basic precaution should be to wear internal tampons, not external pads. Used tampons should be double-bagged in a zip-lock type bag and stored the same as garbage.”

Ohio constitution bans idiots from voting

webmaster — Tue, 27 Feb 2007 20:47:12 +0000

Back when the Ohio constitution was written in 1802, the mentally ill were referred to as idiots rather then to more politically correct terms used today. So, it was written in the constitution that idiots were banned from voting. However, such provisions did not apply to those running for office, so it’s possible to elect an idiot into office.

Supersized McMissile lands woman 2 years in jail

webmaster — Mon, 19 Feb 2007 20:05:29 +0000

When will lawyers, judges, and jurys learn that a supersized McDonald drink is not the same thing as an inter-continental ballistic missile.

Jessica Hall, mother of 3 children(ages 4, 6, and 8), wife of US soldier currently serving his 3rd tour in Iraq, was convicted by Stafford County Jury of Felony offense for maliciously throwing a “missile”(supersized McDonald’s drink) into an occupied vehicle. The felony carries a minimum of 2 years jail sentence.
and they wonder why children aren’t getting proper parenting these days…

No penality for carrying around marijuana till April 3 2007

webmaster — Mon, 19 Feb 2007 16:16:38 +0000

Well I guess at least 1 city in the states is going in the right direction.

City Withdraws Ordinance

Ordinance No. 06, 2007, which amended Section 75-41 and 75-42 of Lafayette’s Municipal Code regarding the maximum penalties for possession of cannabis (marijuana), has been withdrawn. City staff and City Council have determined that more information and analysis are needed on this matter, and it will be the subject of a Council Workshop Meeting on April 3. If and when the ordinance is brought forward after the workshop City Council’s process for voting on the ordinance will start from the beginning, with votes required at two separate Council Meetings.

The April 3 City Council Workshop will be held at City Hall, Council Chambers, 1290 South Public Road, at 5:30 PM. The workshop meeting is open to the public and will be broadcast live on Cable Channel 8.

Speak English only in Pahrump, Nevada

webmaster — Thu, 15 Feb 2007 12:39:30 +0000

Up until February 2007, it was against the law to speak any language other than English in the town of Pahrump outside of Las Vegas. The law which was enacted in November, 2006 was quickly pulled. Pahrump is known as one of the towns in Nevada where brothel’s (whore houses) are legal.

Atheist in Massachusetts = 1 year in prison and/or $300 fine.

webmaster — Thu, 01 Feb 2007 18:25:28 +0000

This law states that if you don’t believe in God or blasphemes the holy name of God, then you could be thrown in jail for a year or fined $300!

PART IV. CRIMES, PUNISHMENTS AND PROCEEDINGS IN CRIMINAL CASES

TITLE I. CRIMES AND PUNISHMENTS

CHAPTER 272. CRIMES AGAINST CHASTITY, MORALITY, DECENCY AND GOOD ORDER

Chapter 272: Section 36. Blasphemy

Section 36. Whoever wilfully blasphemes the holy name of God by denying, cursing or contumeliously reproaching God, his creation, government or final judging of the world, or by cursing or contumeliously reproaching Jesus Christ or the Holy Ghost, or by cursing or contumeliously reproaching or exposing to contempt and ridicule, the holy word of God contained in the holy scriptures shall be punished by imprisonment in jail for not more than one year or by a fine of not more than three hundred dollars, and may also be bound to good behavior.

No sticking wooden sticks up a mountain goat’s ass

webmaster — Wed, 31 Jan 2007 15:12:10 +0000

California has many strange laws and this is just another, one is not allowed to stick wooden sticks or tools of any kind in a mountain goat’s ass.

No giving your pet cocaine or hashish!

webmaster — Sun, 14 Jan 2007 15:57:45 +0000

Crazy drug law out of Georgia forbids anyone from forcing your pet to take drugs! this seems totally odd….

Must ask permission to eat someones garbage.

webmaster — Sun, 14 Jan 2007 13:37:19 +0000

You are not allowed to eat your nebighors garbage without their permission. Doing so will result in Jail time!

No pissing on the pigeons allowed.

webmaster — Fri, 12 Jan 2007 17:16:13 +0000

The state of New York, dissallows anyone to piss on a bird of any kind. Bird Pissing as it has come to be known came about as a result of a few individual getting fed up with pigeons urinating on their heads in Central Park.

California Law states NO Fake Orgasms

webmaster — Fri, 12 Jan 2007 13:10:57 +0000

It’s unlawful in the state of California for either sex to fake ones orgrasm. Appearantly a group of disgruntled husbands got together to get this law passed after being fed up with their wives faking the screams and moans.

Pool tables prohibited from public places

webmaster — Mon, 08 Jan 2007 19:40:39 +0000

This town is really strict about it’s gambling laws as you cannot have a pool table in public places because it would support gambling.

Illegal to piss off dogs

webmaster — Mon, 08 Jan 2007 19:39:18 +0000

Making faces at dogs is considered illegal.

Get the shotgun, Maw.

webmaster — Mon, 08 Jan 2007 19:38:20 +0000

Owning a handgun in this town is illegal, but you’re allowed to own shotguns or any guns bigger than a handgun.

It’s another spitting law

webmaster — Mon, 08 Jan 2007 19:37:55 +0000

It’s illegal to spit on the sidewalk

Driving in circles prohibited on 23rd Avenue

webmaster — Mon, 08 Jan 2007 19:37:10 +0000

Make sure you Google Map your directions before driving in Moline, Illinois. This law prohibits driving aimlessly around town.

It’s illegal to park your truck outside

webmaster — Mon, 08 Jan 2007 19:37:04 +0000

I guess they don’t like how trucks look in Park Ridge

Ice skating on water prohibited

webmaster — Mon, 08 Jan 2007 19:35:27 +0000

This idiotic law prohibits it’s citizens from ice skating on the Riverside pond during the hottest months of the year, June and August!

It’s illegal to install a basketball hoop on your driveway

webmaster — Mon, 08 Jan 2007 19:35:19 +0000

I wonder if this applys to the portable hoops?

It’s illegal to give your dog a lighted cigar

webmaster — Mon, 08 Jan 2007 19:34:05 +0000

I guess they only want their dogs to smoke cigarettes…

No Bee fly zone

webmaster — Mon, 08 Jan 2007 19:34:02 +0000

Bees are prohibited from flying over the streets of Kriland.

Cock-a-doodle-do from afar

webmaster — Mon, 08 Jan 2007 19:33:14 +0000

Roosters are required to crow 300 feet away from any residence otherwise it could face a boot in to the beak and/or being the main course at Sunday’s BBQ.

No spitting on sidewalks at night

webmaster — Mon, 08 Jan 2007 19:29:54 +0000

I guess you need to spit, they want to see you do it in St. Mary’s.

Mispronouced town name = $5 fine

webmaster — Mon, 08 Jan 2007 19:28:20 +0000

A $5 fine can be issued if you mispronounce the Joliet town name. The correct pronunciation is “Joe-Lee-Ette”.

The floor of a porno store must be smooth and none absorbant

webmaster — Mon, 08 Jan 2007 19:28:16 +0000

Hum… I guess they are expecting some indecent activities in the store?

Even strippers gets sundays off in Roswell

webmaster — Mon, 08 Jan 2007 19:24:59 +0000

I guess they really don’t want anyone to work on sunday.

(more…)

Slingshots are only to be used by police officers

webmaster — Mon, 08 Jan 2007 19:17:26 +0000

This law must be from the caveman days. You’re not allowed to use a slingshot unless you’re a cop.

It’s illegal for a chicken to cross the road

webmaster — Mon, 08 Jan 2007 19:16:57 +0000

So, I guess the chicken was trying to get arrested?

Must be on a truck to spit from a moving vehicle

webmaster — Mon, 08 Jan 2007 19:14:58 +0000

It’s illegal to spit from a car or bus, but the law doesnt mention trucks.

It’s illegal to say “oh boy” in Jonesboro

webmaster — Mon, 08 Jan 2007 19:13:25 +0000

This law actually has a sad and dark origin. After the civil war, many former slaves can not find work due to the decimated economy in the south. As a result, there were alot of starving former slaves who would fight eachother over the work of cleaning horses so they can afford a meal. Many of these fights turn bloody and some turned deadly. As a result the law was passed that the white folks who need their horse cleaned are not allowed to openly offer to have someone clean their horse by calling for them. And, the term they used to call for former slaves was “oh boy”

Baseball permit required before playing

webmaster — Mon, 08 Jan 2007 18:51:07 +0000

This law requires you to obtain permission from the village board of trustees before you play on the lit fields.

7-2-3: LIGHTED ATHLETIC FIELDS:A. Permit Required: With exception given to the tennis courts located at the village hall park, any person or group of persons wishing to use a lighted athletic field for evening recreational use shall first apply to the public works director and obtain permission from the village board of trustees.

Terre Haute Doesn’t allowed sidewalk spitting

webmaster — Mon, 08 Jan 2007 18:49:18 +0000

No mice beatings allowed

webmaster — Mon, 08 Jan 2007 18:49:12 +0000

If you’re caught beating a mouse with a baseball bat, you could face up to a $1000 fine.

You can’t throw your couch at your neighbor.

webmaster — Mon, 08 Jan 2007 18:48:43 +0000

It is forbidden to throw your couch, computer, light or television accross the street.

Sec. 54-61. Throwing objects across streets, alleys, sidewalks and other public places.

It shall be unlawful for any person to throw any snowball, stone or other hard substance, or any other missile along, across or over any street, alley, sidewalk or other public place within the limits of the city.

(Code 1974, � 18-2)

Bike tricks illegal

webmaster — Mon, 08 Jan 2007 18:48:17 +0000

Dave Mirra would hate living in this town as it prohibits any trick riding!

Sec. 28-345. Trick riding.

No rider of a bicycle shall remove both hands from the handlebars, or feet from the pedals, or practice any acrobatic or fancy riding on any street. The chief of police or his agent is authorized to approve racing events under section 11-1514 of The Illinois Vehicle Code [625 ILCS 5/11-1514].

(Ord. No. 82-854, � .057, 4-1-82)

Monkey Smokers are Forbidden!

webmaster — Mon, 08 Jan 2007 18:47:07 +0000

In South Bend Indiana, one may not force a monkey to smoke a cigarette.

Invading someone’s space is illegal

webmaster — Mon, 08 Jan 2007 18:46:59 +0000

Keep your distance from anyone in public as it is illegal to crowd them.

Sec. 15-108. Jostling and crowding.

No person shall jostle or willfully crowd any member of the public in any public or private place, or otherwise interfere intentionally with the peaceful pursuit of their affairs.

(Ord. No. 63-695, � .013, 1-21-63)

No rag collecting on holidays

webmaster — Mon, 08 Jan 2007 18:46:21 +0000

Indianappolis disallows one from collecting rags on Sundays and Holidays.

Sec. 401-103. Rag and paper collecting. No person shall engage in the occupation of paper or rag collecting or general junking on foot, or by handcart, automobile or other vehicle, before the hour of 7:30 a.m. or after the hour of 5:30 p.m., except in the area of the city bounded on the north by North Street, on the south by South Street, on the east by East Street, and on the west by West Street; provided, however, no paper or rag collecting shall be permitted at any time of the day or night on Sundays or legal holidays. (Code 1975, § 20-11)

Barbecuing roadkill is illegal

webmaster — Mon, 08 Jan 2007 18:45:24 +0000

This town prohibits the burning of any animal matter. Does this mean it would be illegal to grill up that burger?

Sec. 4-23. Burning of animal matter; prohibited.

No person shall burn any feathers, hides or any other animal matter within the corporate limits of the city.

(Ord. No. 84-935, � .10, 2-20-84)

You can throw rocks at cats!

webmaster — Mon, 08 Jan 2007 18:45:12 +0000

Indianappolis allows the throwing of rocks and other missles at animals as long as it’s in self defense.

Sec. 403-4. Throwing stones or other missiles. It shall be unlawful for any person to throw any stone or other missile at any bird or any animal, except in self-defense, or to throw a stone or other missile on or across any street, alley or public place of the city. (Code 1975, § 20-6)

Horses must stop at traffic lights.

webmaster — Mon, 08 Jan 2007 18:43:01 +0000

You should limit the speed of your horse to 10mph and obey all traffic regulations.

Sec. 441-105. Effect of this chapter on horses and other animals. No horse or other animal, either driven or ridden, shall be left unattended, unhitched or insecurely fastened upon any street or public place, or hitched or left at any place when and where the parking of motor vehicles is prohibited and, when so left, the horse or other animal and any vehicle drawn by it shall be subject to all applicable provisions regulating motor vehicles at any such time and place. No horse shall be driven or ridden on any street in the city at a speed in excess of ten (10) miles per hour and every horse shall be kept under control at all times by the person in charge thereof. Such person shall be subject to all applicable traffic regulations that apply to motor vehicles. (Code 1975, § 29-5)

It’s illegal to have a smelly cock

webmaster — Mon, 08 Jan 2007 18:42:03 +0000

If your cock, chicken or any other fowl smells foul, then you could face a fine as this ordinance states you cannot have a smelly animal.

Sec. 4-6. Noise, odor, etc.

No person shall keep or maintain any animal, poultry or fowl in such a manner to cause inconvenience or disturbance to other persons by reason of noise, odor or other cause.

(Ord. No. 84-935, � .0311, 2-20-84)

Gary Indiana Garlic Laws

webmaster — Mon, 08 Jan 2007 18:39:48 +0000

It’s illegal to eat garlic and goto a movie house, theatre or ride on a public streetcar within four hours of eating said garlic.

No negroes allowed out at night

webmaster — Mon, 08 Jan 2007 18:38:59 +0000

This law states that it is illegal for negroes to be out at night. I’d like to see a cop try to enforce this law nowadays. Remember Rodney King!

“It’s in the Book” the record is banned

webmaster — Mon, 08 Jan 2007 18:38:30 +0000

Fort Wayne, Indiana has banned the record “It’s in the book”.